Little Things

I hesitated last month as my cursor floated over the "publish" button.  The truth is that I always hesitate a little, but that last post?  She really took a couple of tries.

I really hesitated before sharing it.  (Took two days, actually.)  Want a glimpse into my head?

"Facebook is stupid.  You've whined about this enough.  People find it depressing, and are tired of hearing it. No one will read it.  Everyone will read it.  People will pity you.  You don't deserve what you want.  But what if you do?  What if you get it?  What if you don't have that cross to hold on to anymore?  Vulnerability is hard.  Vulnerability is pointless.  Vulnerability is brave; be brave for someone who can't write it or say it."

So I wrote it.  I *gulp* shared it.

And I'm really, really glad I did.  It was scary but empowering...

...even before I got the message in my inbox.

I said it was time and attention.  Time was taken to read my words. Time and initiative were taken to write to me.

Initiative.  I forgot about the importance of that one.

As my unexpected messager did and planned what he said he would, I remembered that it's also follow through.  Doing what you said you would do.

Have I ever said aloud that one of my wishes was to know the kind of man who would read such a book and know what I was talking about?  I suppose though that the wish was not for a book, but for someone with that kind of depth, with a reflective and concerned heart like mine.

Anyway, as it turns out, you can only have the love language or priority that you have been offered and know exists.  Now, after a truly beautiful evening, I can also say that Touch has moved up on my Love Languages list.  It's still after Time for me, but is maybe tied for second place with Service; at any rate it's far more important than I'd ever been offered the chance to know.

There's also confidence.  Confidence is so attractive.  And it helps if you're terribly handsome :)

Wonderful, as truly, truly, wonderful, as all other things are, just those things...

Time

Attention

Initiative

Follow through

...were - are - already an answered prayer.  Hope is in the little things.  Which are actually the big things.