The question of faith

Merrill: Some people are probably thinking this is the end of the world.
Graham: That's true.
Merrill: Do you think it could be?
Graham: Yes.
Merrill: How can you say that?
Graham: That wasn't the answer you wanted?
Merrill: Couldn't you pretend to be like you used to be? Give me some comfort?
Graham: People break down into two groups. When they experience something lucky, group 1 sees it as more than luck - more than a coincidence. They see it as a sign - evidence - that there is Someone up there, watching out for them. Group 2 sees it as just pure luck: a happy turn of chance. I'm sure the people in group 2 are looking at those 14 lights in a very suspicious way. For them, the situation is a 50/50: could be bad - could be good. But deep down, they feel that whatever happens, they're on their own. And that fills them with fear. Yeah, there are those people. But there's a whole lotta people in the group 1. When they see those 14 lights, they're looking at a miracle. And deep down, they feel that whatever is going to happen, there'll be Someone there to help them. And that fills them with hope. See, what you have to ask yourself is what kind of person are you? Are you the kind that sees signs, sees miracles? Or do you believe that people just get lucky? Or look at the question this way: is it possible that there are no coincidences?
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The first time I watched this movie, I didn't like it at all. I saw science fiction, a movie about alien invasion. By "a happy turn of chance," I watched a part of it on TV this weekend at work; I was moved enough to dig it out of a box in the basement to finish today.

I wasted much time trying to be a model survivor, silently determined to build an image of a life all put back together. I have long, quietly believed that while God does not will the heart-wrenching things that happen in our lives, He must allow them to happen. This is our free will. My "healing story" has long been to see the path - a lesson in the tragedies, losses, and mistakes. That doesn't mean that I ever stop crying. While I am not grateful for the experiences themselves, I am grateful for the growth that has come from them.

I've spent about a week wondering how I could so completely miss that fact that this is not a movie about alien invasion; rather, it's a movie about the question of faith. Of puzzle pieces and "coincidence," and the question of good at work in the universe. I stop being amazed at my cluelessness when I take the lesson of both this movie and my history to heart, remembering what I'd forgotten: I receive when I am ready and I am open - when it is time.