The past...still there

I have been working diligently these days to drag myself out of the pit and puuuuush myself to get just one small, definitive task accomplished each day.  This might be something as small as filing some recipes, making a real phone call, reading one chapter, or even publishing a one paragraph blog *wink.*  Today, I finished some continuing education - two modules, actually!

Trauma Update 11 was about chest wall injuries and rib fractures.  Big deal, right?  Yet when I got to the second question, there was an x-ray showing three broken ribs.  Clicking on the answer, I realized my hand was pressed into my right upper chest.  Suddenly, tears were streaming down my face.  Followed by confusion, the urge to laugh, and a familiar ache in the center of my chest.

So was it because the chest x-ray happened to show fractures of ribs 2-4?  Was it because this is just that time of the month when I often find myself weeping at random?  That November 1st is approaching?  Rainy weather?  Could it be because, just last night, I was folded up in my recliner and noticed the grooved and thickened patch of scar tissue in my Achilles tendon, and I was pre-sensitized to another injury reminder?

Who knows.  I've wondered at the answers to those questions for years now.  All I know is that these moments still surprise me, how so often my body remembers these things before my brain or my heart have a chance to catch up.